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Rules Are Made To Be Broken

So this past weekend, the BF and I took the Motorcycle Safety Foundation’s Basic Rider Course. Which — ahem — was overpriced, and the scheduling was a pain, both getting into a class as well as the actual class schedule. I had to give up an entire weekend and be up at 5:30 a.m. for a class that started at 7 a.m. both Saturday and Sunday. That’s a pretty tall order for this night owl!
But this isn’t about the motorcycle class. Not really.
At the end of the class there’s a little skills test. If you pass the test (in many states, including here in Cali) you get a fancy-schmancy official form to take to the DMV that waives the riding test requirement for your motorcycle license. So a lot of people take the class because they feel, or have been told, that passing it is easier than passing the riding test at the DMV. A lot of people also take the class because it’s highly recommended for learning riding skills that are important for safe riding — but mostly, they want to get their license.
The class had been highly recommended by several people I know, so I sucked it up and suffered through two sunrises in a row for it.
So there we are, late Sunday morning as the temps rose to triple digits, sitting on these cute little motorcycles that the class provides, with helmets on, squinting into the sun on a big island of black top nestled between the runway of the local airport and Highway 99, all lined up for our test.
The rules were read. In no uncertain terms, the rules specified that there were only the things one could do during this test that would result in immediate failure and being removed from the course: 1) intentionally dong anything “unsafe” and 2) dropping the bike.
So when one of my fellow classmates dumped the cute little bike sideways and let the gas tank kiss the cement you could feel the collective breath-holding of the other 11 students.
And when the instructors told him to pick up the bike and continue — wait! Continue? He gets to go on with the test? Did we hallucinate that drop? Maybe I didn’t quite understand the words, “Dropping the bike will result in disqualification and you will be asked to leave.”
All I know is that as I watched him pick it up and go on I said to myself, “Don’t tell me it’s going to be just like the State Board.”
I was told the same thing at the beginning of my State Board practical exam: If anyone had forgotten any item, they were out. Done. Fail. You could not leave the examining room to go get anything. You could not borrow it from anyone else. You were told what you needed; it was your responsibility to make sure you had it.
So when the clock was started and one guy piped up that he had forgotten his alcohol, we all expected the proctor to say, “Sorry bub, you’re SOL.” NOT stop and reset the clock and let him get up, leave the building, run to his car, and get his alcohol.
Yeah, the guy who dropped the bike passed the test. And yeah, the guy who forgot his alcohol passed his state board.
I can’t imagine where people get the idea that rules mean nothing.
 

posted @ Friday, May 17, 2013 11:08 AM | Comment (0)

Another Salesman

As a sole proprietor with no staff other than my own little lonesome, I find myself in an uncomfortable no-man’s land place when it comes to running my business like a business. Things like marketing budgets are usually determined by percentages of gross receipts or a percentage of a single customer’s value over the lifetime of their relationship with you as a customer.
 
This means that a realistic marketing budget for me — for most of us — is pretty small, as business marketing budgets go.
 
The other day, I got a call out of nowhere from the company that puts the ads on the shopping carts.
 
Here’s where I get cranky: I asked if they couldjust e-mail me their rate sheet. Yes, I have expressed interest in exploring this venue for advertising, but I also know that most advertising costs are either completely out of my league, or not really a good deal for me. It would save both of us so much agony if I could just see their rates and decide if I want to continue from there. No dice — of course. I have to let the sales rep come by to speak with me in person.
 
And he did. And I had to put aside my lunch so the he could spend 15 minutes repeating the name of the company and asking me if I knew how to say it with a Texas accent. WTF? Really dude?
 
After cutting his pathetically annoying little slide show on his iPad short and explaining to him that this was not my first rodeo so cut to the chase please, he proceeded to whittle his prices down from $2,400 per six months to approximately $1,300 for an entire year. Which is not a bad price, but this is why you shouldn’t send me a sales rep. I wanted to know what it would cost so I can weigh it against other local options and consider it for the future.
 
I was never going to sign on the dotted line and give this guy a check for a deposit before he left my business. The smell of desperation that he emitted did nothing to help his case either. Nor did his constant, “I understand. You see those prices and you have sticker shock. You can’t afford that price, but don’t worry because today I’m authorized to give you a discount so we can get that price down to...”
 
Really dude? Maybe it’s just me. But I don’t need a sales rep to totally gloss over the information I’ve offered when I say I’ve been in business for 20 years and that I’m 90% booked and then tell me that he “understands” that I “can’t afford” what is really a pretty mundane advertising rate.
 
Um. No. I’ll tell you what I can’t “afford,” and that’s wasting my time listening to an antiquated salesman archetype who still treats female business owners like tittering Avon ladies from the 1950s.
 

posted @ Wednesday, May 15, 2013 12:51 PM | Comment (0)

Taking It With Me

Ever get a really bad headache? I mean, I know a lot of people get really bad headaches, and some people get them on a regular basis. I don’t envy them.
 
I rarely get headaches, and when I do, it’s almost always the result of putting too much space between Starbucks runs. So the other night, when I had not only a pretty nasty headache, but a particularly unusual-feeling one, I started entertaining all sorts of wild and crazy (I hope) thoughts that largely went along the lines of, “Uh oh, what if it’s an aneurysm?... Nah, I think that would be a much worse headache...What if it is an aneurysm? Should I go to the ER? Nah. I’m being paranoid...” and so on and so forth. (It does not help that one of my clients is still recovering from an aneurysm that was — thankfully — found before it burst and that another client’s estranged husband recently keeled over quiteunexpectedly from one.)
 
Nevertheless, I felt compelled to run through a few important issues with the BF before I fell asleep. Just in case. Like reminding him that I have a life insurance policy that he is the beneficiary of and that he should really know where that paperwork is. (I still don’t think he was paying attention.) And my basic wishes on what do with me in the case he should have to deal with that.
 
I occasionally feel it important to run through these things with the people who will find themselves tasked with these chores should they out-live me. They never take it seriously and I’m sure they will be quite up a creek should they actually find themselves in the position to wonder what it was that I said on the subject and where they can find the written version of what I told them several hundred times.
 
But this time I added a little extra something I think I might just include in those written instructions. I mean, after all, what exactly will happen to all my glitter when I’m gone?
 
I told the BF to have me cremated and then mix my ashes with my glitter. I thought it was a downright keen notion!
 
But the BF claims that I’ll be nothing but glitter if he does that.
 
Sounded good to me. Good enough to stop worrying about the headache and get some sleep and feel just fine the next day.
 

posted @ Wednesday, May 08, 2013 11:23 AM | Comment (1)

It Costs What?!

How often do your clients tell you how much everyone loves their nails and asks where they have them done — only to have your clients end the story with how those same people who were desperate to get your contact info then say you’re too expensive?
 
I hope your clients are as fabulous as mine when they hear that. I love listening to my clients tell me how often they have that conversation and how disgusted they are with that response. Kinda tickles me inside to hear clients who are just as over it as I am.
 
Seriously. People are really starting to understand that not all salons are created equal and they’re starting to shop around for nail professionals they can trust and communicate with who will give them the nails they want. But then they discover that those professionals are going to cost more than wherever they’ve been going, so they opt out.
 
Then they keep seeing the work they love on other people and keep having the same conversation about how they need to find someone who doesn’t hurt them and who does awesome work, etc.
 
I’m glad more people are getting the hang of the “you get what you pay for” axiom. It’s keeping my book full and helping new techs establish rewarding careers in the industry. And little by little, it’s bringing balance back to the public perception of our end of the beauty business.
 
I just can’t help but shake my head that there are still so many people out there who want a better product and a better experience, but aren’t willing to pay the higher price.
 
“I’d like the Mercedes S Class please... it costs what?! My Hyundai didn’t cost near that much! That’s crazy. You shouldn’t be allowed to charge that much for a car!”
 
And so it goes, from cars, to clothes, to nails. Gotta love it.
 

posted @ Friday, May 03, 2013 11:32 AM | Comment (23)

Not In Real Life

The problem with all those awesome pictures being posted on the Internet by polish and nail art bloggers and other do-it-yourself types of the nail art and fashion variety is that they do these amazing-looking things with their nails, post them online, and then my clients find those pictures on Pinterest and Google image searches and bring those pictures to me and say, “I was thinking of this.”
 
I’m pretty used to this. But lately I’m getting shown a lot of photos of “caviar” nails and other styles that make me look at my clients with my brow all furrowed up and say something along the lines of, “Uhhh, well, OK, but you know that’s not going to last very long, right?”
 
The other day someone showed me a photo of a what looked like a pretty cool hand full of sample nail styles, each one of the nails were done differently. They were very texture-heavy with glitters of varying styles and one caviar nail but all the nails were just that: glitter. Not embedded in anything, no top coat, just the glitter and beads.
 
The problem is that these things don’t last for two weeks between regular salon visits. It might look awesome for a night on the town or special event, but it’s not likely to last. When you’re doing your own nails, it’s no big deal if you have to touch it up or take it off after a day or two. But when you’re a regular salon client and you’re paying good money to have a pro do your nails, it doesn’t make sense to spend it on a look that won’t make it to the next appointment.
 
Which is not to say I won’t do it. I’m thrilled to get into these looks. Love ’em. But I think it’s important to make sure I have that conversation with the client before I charge them for something I know won’t last ... or at least, won’t last through that person’s lifestyle!
 
I am anxiously awaiting the day when the average person learns to recognize pictures of nails that were done to show off versus pictures of nails that were done to be worn.

posted @ Wednesday, May 01, 2013 11:47 AM | Comment (2)

Reality Check

Short and to-the-point: If you hold a world record for something, it’s only reasonable to be prepared that someday, someone is going to best you.
 
If you can’t hack that reality, retire quietly while you’re on top and just let people think you were ready to hand over the reins to the next generation.
 
Yeah. In part I’m directly addressing the recent controversy surrounding Amy Becker’s new world record for fastest set of sculptured pink-and-white nails.
 
But really, that incident just serves as a glaring example of how to, and how not to, behave when the spotlight is on you in all manner of situations.
 
Smile politely, shake hands, and congratulate your competitor. It is the right thing to do and shows the world that you remembered to put your big-girl panties on before you went out on stage.
 
I grew up watching Miss America pageants and it always struck me as bizarre when the winner was announced and the runners up were so happy for her. I’m there, sitting on the floor in front of the TV at 8 years old thinking, “Like H*#&! Those girls want to claw her eyes out! Why are they being so sweet? Why aren’t they yelling and cussing out the judges?”
 
My mom was kind enough to explain that that wasn’t the “ladylike” thing to do. That these girls knew how important it was to keep smiling and be good sports.
 
It was a lesson learned young for me that I may not have even realized I’d learned until the time came for me to pony up the brave face too.
 
Well, whatever. I’m sure we’ll all spend the next year or so griping and mud-slinging and arguing whether or not Amy “cheated” by using a technique no one else thought of using.
 
I have a sneaking suspicion that the next time they hold a race for the Guinness Book of World Records for fastest full set of sculptured pink-and-white nails the wording outlining the definition of “sculptured” will be far more specific.
 
In the meantime: Congratulations, Amy!

posted @ Friday, April 26, 2013 12:08 PM | Comment (2)

Mentor by Proxy

The sister of one of my clients went to nail school. In and of itself, this is neither great nor terrible news to me. I hope she loves doing nails and that it turns out to be as rewarding for her as it has been for me...when she gets around to actually starting her career.
 
For the time being, she is working through her initial breaking-in period. Still a little intimidated by the challenges and trying to get a handle on the things that she’s not confident about.
 
Which means that her sister — my aforementioned client of the past several years (and originally referred by the now-nail-tech sister herself!) — is between nail techs: her sister and me.
 
So I see my regular client about every other fill now. I get to monitor her sister’s progress, give her some pointers to pass along, and do a complete tear-down and overhaul of her nails.
 
It’s a weird sort of mentor-by-proxy relationship, but it’s good to see nail-tech-sister’s work improving and I’m thrilled that I don’t lose touch with a client who’s been part of my life for so long. I hate it when I get attached to someone and they wander off.
 
I remember when I was starting out, still in that awkward, terrified phase. It was so hard to screw up the courage to even book an appointment with a new client. I knew it took me too long to do a set of nails, I knew my new sets were not as sleek as I’d have liked (but they weren’t lumpy!), and I worried that strangers wouldn’t be patient with me. But I loved it when a new client just needed a fill.
 
A fill on a new client meant the primary structure of the nail was already in place. All I had to do was follow the lines and fill in the blanks. It went faster, it took less skill, I didn’t feel like a total noob, and I wasn’t ashamed to ask to get paid for it at the end.
 
I was reminiscing about those days this morning while I tore down the product that’s still a little too thick at the cuticle and eliminated the fill lines where the new tech hasn’t quite figured out what causes them yet. Aesthetically, her work is getting really good, but she has yet to work out the bugs of product contamination and control and solving the technical minutia that ensure her works survives fill after fill without needing major reconstruction. But we’ve all been there. One day it’ll just click. I only hope it helps her to play follow-the-leader every other fill as much as it helped me when I was in her shoes.
 

posted @ Wednesday, April 24, 2013 11:58 AM | Comment (2)

Too Cute

In the time that I’ve been paying attention to it — almost 30 years now — I’ve seen trends in nail art come ’round full circle more than once.
 
I live in an area where nail art has never completely gone away, even during the mid-’90s when “everyone” insisted that nail art was “dead.”
 
During those years, I was a little huffy that I was still spending my days polishing nails a solid color and adorning them with flowers and butterflies, while my colleagues in more sophisticated markets spent their days backfilling pink-and-whites.
 
Now nail art is back with a vengeance. The over-the-top rock star glitter trend is still strong in my neighborhood and continues to pay a solid portion of my bills. On the flip side is the trend toward simple, cutesy designs of the Pinterest ilk.
 
This week I had a client open up her Pinterest account on her iPhone, scroll through some pix that she’d pinned, and show me what she wanted for her nails. So simple. Beyond simple, in fact.
 
I pulled out the paints and proceeded to decorate her nails in the style she had chosen. And while I did so, I laughed at myself a little and explained to her:
 
Not too terribly long ago, I was having a blast when the Ed Hardy craze gave me some challenges to recreate more intricate designs. I did a lot of skulls, and with that style of artwork, I had clients challenging me to step it up with difficult ideas. Nail art was buzzing and clients were willing to pay top dollar for mini-murals that showed off a level of skill beyond the stripes and dots of the ’80s and early ’90s. Ifeltchallenged.
 
Now trends in nail art are back to the uber cute and simple. They’re geared toward the do-it-yourselfers and all about colors and designs that fit into your wardrobe, rather than standalone works of mini-art intended to call attention to your fingertips.
 
Everything old is new again. I teased my client as I told her that I’d just been thinking about how I used to paint skulls on her and now I was doing dots. We both laughed at the crazy way that trends change and I admitted that I couldn’t get too bent about the designs that are so popular now; they might be less challenging from an artistic perspective, but they are just so darn cute!
 

posted @ Monday, April 22, 2013 11:43 AM | Comment (0)

Quality Control

I’ve been seeing a lot of pics around the Internets (and Instagram) of nails that are grown out by several weeks, and still appear to be in great shape, with captions like, “3 Weeks Old! Quality!” or “Quality is 5 weeks old” and so on.
 
I haven’t really decided what I think about this.
 
I guess, yeah, I can totally see why you’d be super proud to show off that your work has held up for five weeks and still looks like it did the day it walked out of the salon only grown out more.
 
It may be that I just never really thought of longevity as being the key factor in determining “quality.” I’ve seen a lot of nails over the years that can stand the test of time, but when you do some investigating you might find that the natural nails have holes filed through them, the enhancements are made with MMA, or that the tech doesn’t disinfect her implements. All these things contribute to my concept of a “quality” service. An educated and conscientious client will weigh those factors against the apparent “quality” of the nails she admired on a friend and may feel they aren’t so great after all.
 
And then there’s also the cases where a set of nails might have been created under ideal circumstances with proper products and could last for eight weeks... but look like poop; all crooked and lumpy.
 
What it eventually boils down to is that we both provide a service as well as create a product. You can provide a qualityservice by providing an atmosphere that clients enjoy, by choosing topnotch products, practicing diligent safety procedures, and honing excellent skills. Whereas the quality of the product you create might be judged by its final appearance and how long it lasts.
 
The dual nature of doing a set of nails is probably what makes me look at those posts and feel like some vital piece of information is missing. Sure, the nails look good and sure, they stayed on for several weeks. But that, in and of itself, does not convince me of their “quality.”
 
It makes me wonder, just how does the average nail client determine the “quality” of a set of nails?
 

posted @ Wednesday, April 17, 2013 12:20 PM | Comment (2)

Timing Is Everything

I’ve gotten pretty good at just being blunt and honest when clients arrive too late. I’m usually pretty comfortable telling them that they missed their chance and will have to reschedule. I’m bad, however, at enforcing that whole “and you owe me for the time I sat here seething on Facebook because you didn’t think to at least text or call me to let me know you were running late.”
 
There are tons of reasons why it can be hard to stick to our policies. The biggest ones are that confrontation can be hard for many of us, and it’s hard to put your foot down and turn that client away when you really want her money.
 
But every so often, I revert to the run-and-hide technique. I know I’m not the only one who’s done it. You know what I’m talking about: Your client is 13 minutes late. Maybe you have errands to run, maybe you just aren’t feeling well that day, maybe confronting the client will only result in blowing up at her because you’re not feeling particularly patient with her shenanigans that day. But you are watching the clock tick away that 15 minute “grace period” and as soon as that second hand rounds the 12, you’ve either locked the door and turned off the lights to hide in the back room, or you’ve run out the back door to avoid passing them as they come in the front. Either way, you are GONE. It’s a take no prisoners sort of day. I say I’ll give you 15 minutes, you weren’t here, I’m out.
 
Sometimes you just have to prove your point to people. They keep showing up 13 minutes late and act like it’s no big deal because it’s less than the 15 you keep telling them they have. Or the ones who saunter in 16 minutes late and don’t understand why you’re flustered and annoyed. You can lecture till you’re blue in the face, but until they show up late one day and discover that you really aren’t there, it doesn’t seem to sink in.
 
So every so often, you have to be ready to run out the door as the clock is striking the time past leniency. Just go outside, get lunch, grab a coffee, go home and pet your dog if you live close enough to do it — and have a dog. Take that break and enjoy returning the confused text that says, “I’m here.” Just say, “Oh? I was too, but I didn’t think you were going to make it.”
 
Be sweet, reschedule, enjoy your break. Enforce your policy in a way that makes a point they won’t forget.

posted @ Friday, April 12, 2013 10:40 AM | Comment (2)
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